birthdays: 4 – the unabashed social climber

My dabbling in birthday numerology has resulted in a ridiculously viral and classic post on my tumblr that goes through all the birthdays. The total sum of all birthdays essentially adds up to a range of numbers 1-9. In that post, I provided snapshots of the personalities of these birthdays. Now, here, on my subscribers-only blog, I shall expound further as to why I came to these conclusions, To continue this series, we’ll get into my other least favourite birthday number: 4.


4, 13, 22, 31: humanitarians, romantic, penetrating, provocative, faithful, pragmatic, reserved, immature, nakedly ambitious, tries too hard to be omnipotent, controversy always seems to surround them, savage for no reason, prides themselves on being infallible but are utterly fallible, know-it-alls, critical, anxious, smart-mouthed yet very sensitive (almost too much so), proud, tries hard to be individualistic but in reality is just like everyone else, very shady, can be and is often very disrespectful, patronizing and egotistical, needs their ass kissed, due to their vast insecurity and inherent inadequacy they have a need to conquer others and if they can’t do so then they will try very hard to destroy them, wayyy too sensitive and resorts to being caustic and abusive when they’re hurt (which is all the time), tries too hard to act/look/talk hard, can be tough but sweet, can be quite judgmental, always working, likes to one-up people, needs control and is often very self-controlled, often fake, passive-aggressive, very opportunistic and savvy, great at making friends, very contradictory and hypocritical, often very talented and hardworking, competitive, inspires others, wants to be known as kind and great in everyone’s eyes, almost always supremely unlikable individuals, often downright repulsive, has low self-esteem and projects it on others, often has hidden motives, adroit in using people’s emotions for their own ends, THE BIGGEST HATERS ON THE PLANET

I think I pretty much summed them up there. Those who have these birthdays (especially those born on the 4th and 22nd) are the ones who I’m the most indifferent towards and amused by, but in the interest of fairness, let’s dive into the psyche of these people, because if nothing else, they’re moderately interesting psychological case studies.


When I think of 4’s, I think of the character Eve Harrington in the classic film All About Eve. They’re hurt, bitter, broken, miserable insecure bitches and often have low self-esteem and inadequacies within themselves, but they cover it up with false “self-love” and “assertiveness” which is actually condescension, aggressiveness, cockiness, and arrogance. This is evidenced in their unabashed social climbing they do. All social climbing have one thing in common: they seek to increase the social climber status by attacking and taking status away from others. They revel in this, since in their mind it secures their power over others, which is very important to them. They’re often sad cases with attitude problems. They can’t, or don’t know how to reconcile their pain in a healthy way, so they direct it back out in mean, cruel, and insensitive ways – hurting others just because they were hurt. This process works only briefly, and usually generates extreme guilt in the person, making them stop for awhile. But, the pain of their past hasn’t been healed, so once again they try to bleed off the pain by hurting someone by being mean or rude. It’s like draining the pressure in a boiler. They know they’re inferior and broken, so they take it out full force on the people they envy and those whose true authentic power that they want. They often say what they don’t mean. They’re also forces of nature, and they somehow always seem to draw deep emotions out of people, and a lot for people seem to be deeply drawn to them. Fours, in turn, are often drawn by those who know how to control their emotions and make them work for them as well as those who have a deeper well of emotion than they and aren’t scared of displaying it.

They have the amusing paradox of being mean AND hypersensitive at the same time, but the key is if one feels that these people are actually worth the time you have to take to get to know them, ignore their natural walls, abnormal need for control, rudeness and meanness, and love them anyway. If one can get through to that hurting part and heal and love it, these individuals can be loyal and even amazing friends for life. (incidentally, it’s for this reason that I always seem to see these individuals deeply connected to 2’s, 5’s and 9’s because I think 4’s sense in them a kindred spirit, or someone they can use this strange type of “love” on and still feel accepted. But I’ll cover those numbers at a later date). It might seem crazy, but a common way these people try and pull their partner/friends close is by expressing anger (of which there is a lot of) and unneeded childish aggression, often ruthlessly attacking perceived weaknesses.  It usually works in the opposite way (unfortunately), but often underneath the anger is a strong plea for connection and love. The anger is a mask of protest about not getting that love. They like to create conflict and are very restless. They’re whiny and their edginess is based on their M.O. that “people want to hurt me; I must hurt them first to be safe”. They’re often very petty and very small and are too selfish to show any real compassion for those going through a tough time or a tragedy, often pouring salt on the wound (although strangely enough, they’re often touted as paragons of compassion and virtue).

They’re not satisfied with the ordinary, and more often than not they do tend to lead extraordinary lives. They have an accessibility and a mystery at the same time. They can be calm and insanely disciplined. But they are also very fiery and passionate, and often make rash and headstrong decisions and can be very immature and insecure about themselves because of the need for balance that the number 4 suggests. This is well illustrated in the case of Joan Fontaine (October 22) and Olivia de Havilland (who interestingly enough was a Cancer [a 1, which I’ll get into at a later time]). During their much-written-about sibling rivalry, younger sister Joan felt Olivia was favored by their mother. Not intrepid, creative, intelligent, or commanding enough to be original and create her own lane in life (see my note on Beyoncé) she found her sister on the verge of a career in Hollywood and decided she wanted the same thing. Olivia’s career speaks for itself (Gone With The Wind, winning a well-deserved Academy Award for Best Actress for The Heiress, an extensive filmography, distinguished Broadway work, as well as a damehood), but Joan caught her big break: winning the first-rate part of the “second Mrs. De Winter” opposite Laurence Olivier in Alfred Hitchcock’s first American film Rebecca (1940), in which she confessed to having an inferiority complex. They can also (only when seriously evolved) be inspirational, using their talents to move masses of people in a way very few can, such as Barack Obama (August 4), and obnoxious personalities like Beyoncé (September 4), her husband Jay-Z (December 4), and their friend Justin Timberlake (January 31 [another classic case of the low-level 4]). They are victims masquerading as warriors and use their victimhood as a weapon and other opportunistic tactics to cement their power. However, there is a lot of fixed-sign-esque (especially that of a Leonine/Scorpionic nature) ego associated with the number 4, and this requires everyone to bow down and kiss their ass. If the 4 doesn’t get this type of treatment, then they’ll destroy everything and everyone in their wake to assuage their hurt feelings and damaged ego, such as it is in the case of Meghan Markle (also born on August 4) and what she and her husband Harry are currently doing to the Royal Family.

Meghan tried to gain unconditional and total acceptance from them/England/the world. Since she didn’t get it, she and Harry took their ball and went home” by backing out of the Royal Family and the duties associated with it and moving with their children to America, effectively cutting themselves off from Harry’s grandmother, brother, and ailing grandfather. Which brings me to another point about 4’s: they like to do things on their own terms, often alienating others along the way to satisfy themselves. Now that Meghan has had time to think about the “abuse” that she feels that she has received, she’s going to get her ultimate revenge by trying to destroy the Royal Family with allegations of racism and mental/emotional abuse. Note: it wasn’t a problem when they were courting, and it wasn’t a problem when they got married, but since she didn’t get the “kid glove” treatment she wanted, now they’re a “racist family”. I often wonder, if the firm/tabloids/press went after Princess Diana so brutally, as blonde-haired, blue-eyed and pretty as she was, what did Markle honestly expect? This speaks to the 4s often shocking naivety. Also, Markle kept referring to Kate Middleton in her interview, so that means that she’s fixated on Kate as a point of envy. This is how hate and negative emotions will cause things to change and often unnecessarily so.

As far as Jay-Z, it is said that he made it hard for the late rapper DMX (Sagittarius, and a soulful 9[December 18]) to get a footing in his rap career and tanked the rapper Cam’ron’s career before it even happened; that’s how threatened he was by them. The fuckery of Justin Timberlake speaks for itself.

They seem to get out of scrapes and trouble that others have to endure because there is a perverse societal notion that the bad and the worst of us automatically is the best of us. They tend to be abusive under the guise of “doing it out of love” but it really is to ensure that they’ve passed on the hurt they’ve experienced. They’re fierce, often unnecessarily so, and they love hard, often getting into abusive and toxic relationships; to them, there is no love without a fair share of pain involved, either mental/emotional or even physical. On the symbolism of the number four, ceremonies and ritual acts are often repeated in fours. It’s also interesting to note that the number four is depicted by the symbol of the cross and by the symbol of the swastika. The swastika as some misbelieve was not created by Hitler. It was instead borrowed from the Native American and occult beliefs of which Hitler had great interests. Hitler derived his “insanity” of power from his misdirected interpretation and use of metaphysical principles. He used knowledge that his human consciousness couldn’t possibly understand and the use of this knowledge for personal gain is part of the imbalance that creates the chaos and karma. As balanced as this number is in theory, in reality, this chaos is what 4’s thrive on. The number 4 is an even number, a number that symbolizes the principle of putting ideas into form and it signifies work and productivity. As such, this is reflected in their work personalities and they make excellent workers. They should be themselves, but they can’t relax. On the positive side (only when evolved), they can be active, hard-working, systematic, diligent, careful, objective, firm, introverted, serious, patient, reserved, thoughtful, sensible, analytic, calm, orderly and loyal. For those born on the 4th, 13th, 22nd, and 31st, this describes them in a nutshell.

They are, more often than not, broken messes. Their issues come up when they feel hurt or attacked by someone they know whether it be an acquaintance, friend or a romantic partner. If they feel hurt by you, hurt gets put six feet under and revenge rears its ugly head. They almost unconsciously shift into defensiveness and by the time the conversation is over, if they’re smart, they’ve said many things that they regret later on. But instead of showing their regret, they often act more childish, and offensive because of their foolish pride. These are the angry, hurt children (no matter their age) who are filled with rage. and they are often hard to be around. They’re often narcissistic assholes. They’re always involved in some sort of overly dramatic scenario. They don’t think before they react. These are the people who display a fixed mindset by always needing to show how good they are, and they often derive their own self-esteem by being “good” and “better” than others. This is because their hearts have been shattered in a million pieces on different levels and they’re desperately trying their best to find balance, they just do it in silly and unnecessary ways. They’re often the bitter ones walking around mad at the world while the people who hurt them are living happy and carefree lives. They need to learn to forgive and MOVE ON. They can definitely benefit from a therapist, more often than not. But all in all, they’re just human beings at the end of the day.

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